it all started friday, when i was fixing my salad for lunch that night. a bowl of lettuce, and then the fixins. i ran out back and picked 1 fresh banana pepper, and a jalapeno to chop up and put on my salad...mmmmmm....peppers....... get all my shit together, and am ready to head out the door. but wait, now i hafta pee. so i dash into the bathroom, and take care of my business, and pat the dog on the head and give the wife a smooch, and off to work i go. this is where the problem starts to rear its UGLY head! about half way out of the subdivision, i start to notice a "warming" sensation on my nether-region. then within 30 seconds, the warming sensation rapidly increases to a BLINDING, burning pain, the likes i have never experienced before. Thats when it occurred to me that in my haste to get out the door to work, i forgot to wash my dick-beaters after i had been chopping those peppers, then, when i went to take a leak, and got the capsaicin (the shit that makes them hot) from the peppers on my junk.
fellas...let me tell you, DO NOT EVER...EVER DO THIS!!!!
my shit felt like it had been doused in gas, and set on fire!!!!
this was by far the most intense pain in that part of my body that i have EVER felt!
traveling down the fox highway in total agony, i simply cant take it anymore, and i stop at the shell station, and RUN inside to the bathroom. i had to try to stop this burn some way, somehow, so the only thing i can think of is to run water over the affected area. so here i stand with my pants and drawers around my ankles, with my junk over the sink flushing it with water, and this made the burn subside for only a moment, then come back with a fucking vengeance!!
so i dry my self off and get dressed and onto work i go...and this terrible burn continued for 45 minutes. there were times when i thought i was going to pass out it burned so bad!!
finally it subsided and i got back to normal, and finished work.
dont really know if this qualifies as an actual rant, but let me tell you guys...this shit was unbelievable, and you can bet your ass i will ALWAYS was my hands after handling those damn peppers!!
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Vinny50 
Originally Posted by PonymanfiveO
